The phrase “It’s okay not to be okay” has become a powerful mantra. However, for many Filipinos, the question remains: when is it truly okay to feel that way? In fact, the Philippine adaptation of It’s Okay to Not Be Okay, starring Anne Curtis, Joshua Garcia, and Carlo Aquino, answers this by turning mental health struggles into a relatable story of resilience. Not only is the show entertaining, but it also serves as a guide to understanding that emotional pain is a normal part of life, and healing is a process we all deserve.
Emotions, both positive and negative, are fundamental to being human. Life naturally comes with ups and downs, and our feelings reflect these experiences. For instance, it’s normal to feel sad after a loss, anxious before a big change, or frustrated when facing a challenge. On the other hand, trying to suppress or ignore these feelings can be harmful. Research shows that suppressing emotions can lead to increased stress, anxiety, and even depression (Gross & Levenson, 1997). Therefore, giving ourselves permission to feel these emotions without judgment helps us better understand and process them.
Accepting that it’s okay not to be okay is an act of self-compassion. Dr. Kristin Neff, a leading researcher in the field, defines self-compassion as treating ourselves with the same kindness and understanding we would offer a good friend in a similar situation. This involves three key components:
- Self-kindness: Being warm and understanding toward ourselves, rather than critical.
- Common humanity: Recognizing that suffering and personal inadequacy are part of the shared human experience.
- Mindfulness: Observing our feelings and thoughts without judgment or suppression (Neff, 2003).
By embracing the belief that it’s okay not to be okay, we practice self-compassion and foster resilience. In other words, it allows us to acknowledge our pain and difficulties without getting trapped in self-criticism.
While it is normal to experience periods of not feeling okay, it is equally important to notice when these feelings start to overwhelm you. Moreover, if sadness, anxiety, or hopelessness begins to interfere with your daily life, relationships, or work for an extended period, then it may be time to seek professional help. In such cases, a mental health professional can provide valuable tools and support to navigate these challenges in a healthy way.
In conclusion, giving ourselves permission to not be okay is a vital step toward emotional well-being. Ultimately, it promotes self-compassion, fosters emotional resilience, and allows us to process our feelings in a healthy way. By accepting our full range of emotions, we can better care for ourselves and navigate the complexities of life.
References
Gross, J. J., & Levenson, R. W. (1997). “Hiding feelings: the costs of emotional suppression.” Journal of Abnormal Psychology, 106(1), 95-101. https://doi.org/10.1037/0021-843X.106.1.95
Neff, K. D. (2003). “Self-compassion: An alternative conceptualization of a healthy attitude toward oneself.” Self and Identity, 2(2), 85-101. https://doi.org/10.1080/15298860309032
